Trying for balance

I have been feeling a bit blah lately. I think spending an entire week in bed ill has left me with a head full of fuzz and a to do list blown to hell. I still don’t feel great but I feel a lot better and am trying to reemerge. I am still a bit off balance but I am hoping after a week of attention to life, health, goals I will feel energetic, healthy and more of myself again. Here is a snap shot of some of the things floating around my head.

Things that are haunting me because I know I should be doing them but life is getting in the way:
• Researching grants for my African project.
• Clean out my closet.
• Clean out the office and downstairs floor, in fact clean my whole house it is a disaster!
• Wash my car.
• Catch up on correspondence.
• Reaching out to new galleries.
• Take photos of everything for my on-line shop.
• Setting up an eBay store.
• Learn how to make prints of my paintings, if anyone knows how I’d LOVE some pointers! Please email me if you have any.


Things I am doing/have done to make myself feel better about me on the outside, cuz sometimes you just need to.
• Dye my hair dark brown for the fist time, I think I am feeling more like a brunette. Not that I am one naturally, but it feels right for now.
• Tint my eyebrows and lashes to match my new hair because blonde brows and lashes coupled with my light complexion make me look like a corpse without make-up (which is my usual state).
• Get a facial in hopes of healing my eyes.
• Gat seaweed wrap and massage.
• Meet with my personal trainer for a new program, I need a change and some new motivation.
• Take vitamins daily
• Do a 3 day juice fast.

Things that are driving me crazy:
• Being sick for the better part of the month.
• Not going to the gym for two weeks because of illness and feeling huge and disconnected from my body.
• My list of domestic chores.
• How quickly time is flying by, we are going to be leaving before I know it.
• The painful stress rash that has broken out on my eyes of all places making me look at least 10 years older.
• My teeth, I have several that are killing me (including my wisdom teeth that are a decade late in being pulled) and my dentist had to cancel my appointment and I am waiting for another opening.

Things I am doing to try to shake the cobwebs out of my head, re-engage with my life and my goals:
• Work on my journal, which serves as a journal, sketchbook, vision board and goal record. I worked on it a lot this weekend and I am in love with my new book! I started it when 7 beautiful women came to visit and I feel them with me when I work on it.
• Start a new painting.
• Draft some emails/letters to various types of contacts for my African project. I am opening myself up to advice, support, contacts, connections, I am hoping to create a network and learn from others. I feel like I need to reach out for support in order to accomplish these goals.

Miscellaneous thoughts, activities and ramblings:
• I am reading The Alchemist by Paul Coelho, The State of Africa, and The Elephant Vanishes by Haruki Murakami.
• I am watching Vanilla Sky, An Inconvenient Truth, a documentary about an artist called, Robert Rauschenberg: Inventive Genius and am anxiously awaiting the release of The Science of Sleep on Tuesday.
• I am listening to a mixed Cd made by the beautiful Susannah with ink on her fingers. I love song 14, keep playing it over and over!
• I am drinking tea, lots of tea.
• I am loving the thick morning fog that makes the world feel magical allowing me to pretend to be in a novel like The Mists of Avalon.
• I am hoping to take a trip to see some dear friends before leaving for Africa. Now that I know we will be gone for so long, I am aching to see as many close friends as possible. Can anyone come see me here???

I hope all is well in your worlds and that you all have much clearer minds than I do right now!