Monday, February 05, 2007

Trying for balance

I have been feeling a bit blah lately. I think spending an entire week in bed ill has left me with a head full of fuzz and a to do list blown to hell. I still don’t feel great but I feel a lot better and am trying to reemerge. I am still a bit off balance but I am hoping after a week of attention to life, health, goals I will feel energetic, healthy and more of myself again. Here is a snap shot of some of the things floating around my head.

Things that are haunting me because I know I should be doing them but life is getting in the way:
• Researching grants for my African project.
• Clean out my closet.
• Clean out the office and downstairs floor, in fact clean my whole house it is a disaster!
• Wash my car.
• Catch up on correspondence.
• Reaching out to new galleries.
• Take photos of everything for my on-line shop.
• Setting up an eBay store.
• Learn how to make prints of my paintings, if anyone knows how I’d LOVE some pointers! Please email me if you have any.

Things I am doing/have done to make myself feel better about me on the outside, cuz sometimes you just need to.
• Dye my hair dark brown for the fist time, I think I am feeling more like a brunette. Not that I am one naturally, but it feels right for now.
• Tint my eyebrows and lashes to match my new hair because blonde brows and lashes coupled with my light complexion make me look like a corpse without make-up (which is my usual state).
• Get a facial in hopes of healing my eyes.
• Gat seaweed wrap and massage.
• Meet with my personal trainer for a new program, I need a change and some new motivation.
• Take vitamins daily
• Do a 3 day juice fast.

Things that are driving me crazy:
• Being sick for the better part of the month.
• Not going to the gym for two weeks because of illness and feeling huge and disconnected from my body.
• My list of domestic chores.
• How quickly time is flying by, we are going to be leaving before I know it.
• The painful stress rash that has broken out on my eyes of all places making me look at least 10 years older.
• My teeth, I have several that are killing me (including my wisdom teeth that are a decade late in being pulled) and my dentist had to cancel my appointment and I am waiting for another opening.

Things I am doing to try to shake the cobwebs out of my head, re-engage with my life and my goals:
• Work on my journal, which serves as a journal, sketchbook, vision board and goal record. I worked on it a lot this weekend and I am in love with my new book! I started it when 7 beautiful women came to visit and I feel them with me when I work on it.
• Start a new painting.
• Draft some emails/letters to various types of contacts for my African project. I am opening myself up to advice, support, contacts, connections, I am hoping to create a network and learn from others. I feel like I need to reach out for support in order to accomplish these goals.

Miscellaneous thoughts, activities and ramblings:
• I am reading The Alchemist by Paul Coelho, The State of Africa, and The Elephant Vanishes by Haruki Murakami.
• I am watching Vanilla Sky, An Inconvenient Truth, a documentary about an artist called, Robert Rauschenberg: Inventive Genius and am anxiously awaiting the release of The Science of Sleep on Tuesday.
• I am listening to a mixed Cd made by the beautiful Susannah with ink on her fingers. I love song 14, keep playing it over and over!
• I am drinking tea, lots of tea.
• I am loving the thick morning fog that makes the world feel magical allowing me to pretend to be in a novel like The Mists of Avalon.
• I am hoping to take a trip to see some dear friends before leaving for Africa. Now that I know we will be gone for so long, I am aching to see as many close friends as possible. Can anyone come see me here???

I hope all is well in your worlds and that you all have much clearer minds than I do right now!


Blogger Georgia said...

Lots on my mind today too... I am well, just wrapped up in m mind.

I love your dark hair!!


10:26 AM  
Blogger Boho Girl said...

oh my...will you STOP looking so gorgeous in your brunette locks? okay, don't stop...cuz me likie very much and i'm drooling.

oh girl...i've been in the same headspace. i have so much to tell you so lets talk soon.

i have been so sick. sicker than sick...and i am not used to the most tiny things taking so much out of me. today i am finally resurfacing to the great outdoors to go shopping and i know it is going to wipe me out.

so, if i don't call you later today, i will try your cell tomorrow cuz i'm missing you like mad.

sounds like you have loads to share with me too.

okay, i love you sexy brunette YOU.


12:36 PM  
Blogger Amber said...

I really think this has been a hard month for people. I have felt the same, and read many other friends have also...Maybe in the stars.

But it sounds like you will have some excitement son! Good for you.


9:24 PM  
Blogger gkgirl said...

love the new hair!

and i hope that you get
lots done but don't beat
yourself up if you don't...
it will come.

3:35 AM  
Blogger Frida World said...

I'm so glad that you are feeling a bit better and hope that your health will continue to return.

My mind is so muddled and busy right now that reading your lists set me off on wild tangents of my own.

I am very excited and curious about your plans for Africa - I'm scheming about things along those lines myself.

Please tell me more.

And keep getting better.

And doesn't Haruki Murakami rock!

And I hope the personal trainer is perfectly in tune and gives you exactly what you need.


6:52 AM  
Blogger la vie en rose said...

yep, i am totally lovin' the hair...

11:22 AM  

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